Update

As you all know we still have not been matched with a child. The March list came out on the 21st. Our China Cordinator emailed us that night at 10:00 saying that the list was out and that so far she was seeing a repeat of the February list. I talked to her the next day and she said that she was baffled and did not know what was happening. So, the wait for the next list began. It should come out around the same time this month.

I have read various adoption blogs where the parents fell in love with a particular child on an advocates blog (An Orphans Wish, New Day Foster Home, Pearl River Outreach, Love Withour Bounds, etc... ). They had their agency inquire about the child, they received the file, then pursued and adopted that child. So, I started looking ;) I asked about 2 children...they were already matched with families. I asked about more...our CC said 3 of those were not matched. She is supposed to find out more about their individual situations so we'll see... In the meantime...I sent her a few more children. See, my problem is that I fall in love with every single one of those precious little faces. It is soo hard not to. Last night I got onto the actual China Shared List. There are soo many children on the list with serious disablities, all I could think of is how those kids will grow up in the orphanges and then at age 14 pushed out the door to live on their own. Can you imagine? 14!!!

We did experience the roller coaster of emotions that comes with receiving and passing on a referral. Our CC called us one night about 10:00. I had gone to bed early which is very unusual. Brian came in the room and told me that our CC had emailed me telling me to call her. She was in the 'system' and could not get out to get our phone number. I called and she said she had a little girl she thought we would be interested in. She said it looked as though her needs were minor. She was trying to research some of the diagnoisises on her phone but needed to act quickly or her file may be taken by someone else. She went ahead and locked-in her file so we could review it. We had 72 hours to make a decision. There were a few things that were of concern as we began to research some of the diagnosises. We decided to have UAB review the file the next morning. So we talked about what we had read and prayed. After very little sleep that night, we forwarded the file to UAB's International Adoption Clinic. Brian started researching the orphange she lives in. He found an advocate website for those children and found the sweet little girl. The information on the website said she was diagnosed with a physical disability that was not in her file. One much more severe than we thought we were called to care for. It is not one we checked on the Special Needs Checklist during the Homestudy. I prayed that somehow we would be guided in making this decision. I then thought of a friend that God put in my life many months before. She works at the IAC, we are in the same Sunday School class and we work together with children at our church with Special Needs. She has experience and knowledge with this particular disability and she was able to give me a lot of information for Brian and I to talk over. We did. We prayed. We decided not to pursue the adoption of this little girl. We called the IAC and told them not to review her file. Passing on this referral was hard and something I am still processing. I think of her often. I pray someone is called to care for her. I did not see her on the China SN list last night so I hope someone is pursuing her adoption. I debated on whether or not to talk about this part of the adoption, but this is part of the journey for many.

So, we are now waiting. Some days we are patient and some days we are not.